Remember when our Indian marriages were rock-solid? When husbands were revered as Patidev and wives were as dedicated as Sita? For centuries, marriage in India has been the steady foundation upon which our families and communities have been built. It’s been the cornerstone of tradition, values, and social norms, providing unwavering stability and sanctity in an ever-changing world.

But then, something shifted. Extramarital affairs slowly and steadily crept into our lives. At first, they were whispered about only among the super-rich and the extremely poor. The middle class wanted no part in it; they were too busy securing their children’s futures. Even when affairs did happen, they were extremely rare and well-hidden. Never accepted, they were unanimously condemned as trash.

Fast-forward to today. Times have changed and how. Marriages now teeter on the edge of absolute collapse. Extramarital affairs are on the speedy rise, and trust – the glue holding relationships together – is eroding fast. Traditional values, once sacred and the true essence of our country, are being discarded. The most shocking part? Extramarital affairs are no longer taboo or trash; they’re the new normal accepted by all. Everybody turns a blind eye and ear. Nobody is interested in knowing more. The shock value is zero.

So, what sparked this desperation? This turn of events was one that we used to only associate with the West and never us. Many blame social media platforms like Facebook, Instagram, and WhatsApp. It is true to some extent. Just a few clicks, and you can connect with anyone, anywhere. Harmless chats and friend requests can quickly turn into passionate affairs where photographs in various stages of undress are exchanged, sometimes without even knowing the other person’s true identity or character. Age also no longer seems to be a limit; young boys relentlessly pursue women old enough to be their mothers and older men are sexually grooming naive, teenage girls.
But is social media truly to be blamed? Only partly. If one’s marriage is strong and the couple totally devoted to each other, nothing can break the bond, but alas, marriages are built on looks, social status and financial security rather than on compatibility.

The real issue lies with married couples themselves. Indian couples often neglect communication and romance post-marriage. Husbands focus only on providing financially. Leisure time is spent chilling with friends and occasional holidaying with family is considered enough to keep the marriage going. Wives on the other hand feel they are neglected and burdened with housework and children.

After years of marriage, responsibilities enter and sex takes a back seat. Men, always enticed by the thrill of variety start missing the fun and start searching to fill the void and gradually start sacrificing meaningful relationships for fleeting pleasures. Wives, who are now working too and financially independent are tired of indifferent and incommunicative husbands and start turning towards those who show the slightest of admiration and validation. The attention they receive is intoxicating, and they slip into affairs without realizing it’s temporary. Both parties try to fulfil their unmet desires and seek partners who will make them forget about things such as financial stress and mismatched priorities.

So, the affairs start one after another. After the initial whirlwind romance, the man gets bored and moves on to another woman. He repeats the cycle, devoting energy and passion until he gets what he wants. Then, the passion fades, the calls decrease, and he moves on to another new face and another body. The woman who initially is wooed, appreciated, and validated in great earnest finds the adulation diminishing and is by now so addicted, addicted to the undiluted attention and heady sex, moves on to the next persistent suitor and another. And thus the vicious cycle continues, leaving behind a trail of emotional debris.

The consequences are far-reaching: eroding trust and intimacy, normalizing emotional detachment, prioritizing instant gratification over long-term fulfillment, and disintegrating family structures.

There are no winners in this game; only losers. The main losers are the children, forced to witness parental fights, egos, and indifference. They learn early on that marriage means abuse, cheating, and fights. They don’t recall the love that their parents once shared.

So, do we want a society like this where betrayals and hatred fill the air. How do we break this cycle? How do we reclaim the sanctity of marriage? All is not lost. We can restart and rework our marriages. Let us do it the right way from the beginning. It starts with choosing partners wisely and discussing expectations and dreams with each other. Going for pre-marital counselling and exploring compatibility, values, and expectations are essential. Attending communication workshops and enhancing active listening and conflict resolution skills are crucial. Developing self-awareness and empathy is vital.

Marriages need to be worked on and nurtured every single day. Meaningful communication is key. Foster deep conversations, active listening, and emotional intelligence. Establish a mutually respected work-life balance and prioritize quality time together. Take time off, travel without friends or children, and rejuvenate your relationship. Rekindle intimacy and connection. It’s not too late to change course. We can still value intimacy, empathy, and family unity. We can create a world where marriage is a sanctuary, a haven of love, trust, and understanding, where marriage is revered, not just tolerated.

Let’s focus on building meaningful connections, not fleeting thrills. By doing so, we’ll strengthen the foundation of Indian marriages and create a brighter future for generations to come.